Dear teacher who said this project couldn't be finished the day before, Sorry, what was that? Sincerely, 98%.
Welcome to my life as an English major.
The Irony Never Ends
Last night I went home for dinner with my floor-family (my closest friends that live in the same dorm as I do [or at least did before the roof started leaking]) and it was really hilarious. My dad made amazing food as usual and we pigged out. Kyla dropped several F-bombs in front of my parents while we were playing an intense game of Twisted Fish. They just laughed. Woo.
The only bad thing that happened was: I’ve been making this list of stuff I forgot to bring to college that I was going to get whenever I went back home. Of course, when I went home, I forgot to bring the list.
Cool Karma:
the guarantee that a moment of extreme coolness will ultimately lead to tripping on something in front of an audience later.
On Friday I had an insanely cool moment. I was wearing my new boots and my tight jeans, feeling pretty cute as I rode around a corner on my bike and simultaneously whipped my sunglasses off my head, flipped my hair, and put the sunglasses on my face.
I looked. So cool.
In the moment I spent enjoying it though, I came to terms with the fact that at some point, I would do something ridiculously dorky to bring my cool-level back down to normal.
When I arrived back at my dorm, I attempted to dismount my bike by the bike racks. Cool Karma was quick to take advantage of the combination of my 2-inch heels and my skintight jeans. I managed to half get off my bike, but ended up losing my balance and collapsing into someone else’s bike, bringing my own bike down on top of me. There were definitely people watching.
As an added bonus, there is now a nice big bruise on my thigh so I can remember just how cool I really am.
Back At School
Just took a 20 minute snooze in the sunshine on the green before I had class. Which I am clearly paying close attention to now. This has been a very chill Friday. I’m liking it. Especially since tonight Kyla and I are going to a rave (?) sponsored by our university.
Also, it’s finally cold enough for THE FIRST FLANNEL FRIDAY OF FALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I do hope you’re celebrating. This morning I had a thought that was sort of clever or maybe amusing, but I can’t remember what it was….
If I think of it, I’ll post it. Anyway, enjoy the beautiful weather. Feel it. Go out and enjoy breathing the air. Have a lovely weekend.
So here I am up late again. I will queue this post so people actually read it, but know that I started writing it at 2:17 a.m. I’m so silly.
Anyway,
http://www.magneticpoetry.com/play/index.html
You should go here if you like to play with word magnets like I do. The website sells magnets for fridges and such, but also has an online play area where you can just experiment with their different collections of words and even submit your poem to be posted on their website.
Above is the one I did (when I should have been sleeping). So what are you waiting for? Go, frolic, waste your time writing existential poetry, be merry!
Snarkyness
When I was working at Macy’s on Wednesday……… someone told me I was…………………………… doing a good job.
I didn’t know the people there knew how to say those words in the same sentence.
Mushy Gushy
I am craving hot cocoa.
However, the point in my creating this post is to direct your attention to this:
http://kisstixx.myshopify.com/
Compatible lip balms made for kissing. Wow.
At first I was like, OH THAT’S ADORABLE.
But then I thought about the times that I’ve kissed somebody with lip gloss on and how boys tend to make this -what the foshizzle did you just do to my lips!?- face when your lips are sticky/waxy/what is the texture of chapstick?
I used to eat chapstick when I was little. I still sort of think it tastes good. Moving on.
So what if you both put on your little paired lip balms and then you get really into kissing, then you forget that you’re kissing because it tastes like chocolate covered strawberries and then you end up eating your boyfriend? Or worse yet, you’re totally turned off by all the goo all over your face?
What’s the setup like for this?
“Hey baby sugar cakes.”
“Hey pookie McMuffin face. Wanna put on our matching lip balm and make out?”
“Oh, yeah, Puppywuppykins. It drives me crazy bonkers when you taste like a sour apple. MMmmmm.”
I’m not sure I know many guys who would willingly try this. If you are a guy who would try these things and you think your gf would be into it, buy her a pair. She will think it’s super romantic and… sweet. HEHEHEHEH.
I am such a weirdo. Goodnight.
