home
archive
ask/tell
a girl named rose

When Your Life Becomes the Twilight Zone/A Christmas Carol

So guys, I’m afraid I have some bad news.

My phone is possessed. 

Don’t panic BUT I’ve assessed the situation and it appears there are one to several ghosts attempting to make contact with me right now. Left untouched, the front screen of my phone lights up at random, and when it’s unlocked, oh-ho! it gets crazy. It’s like someone is just pressing random buttons. If I can press a number before it does anything, it fills the screen with numbers and pound signs until it exceeds the number of possible characters. Sometimes it tries to call such numbers. So far only Verizon’s recorded message has been on the other end, but eventually I’m pretty sure it’s going to be the ghost of Christmas-Past or something. That was Nicolette’s conjecture.

It makes sense because I was assailed by a random burst of Christmas spirit the other night. I should have seen this coming.

I’m really worried about when the ghost of Christmas-Future comes. It’s going show me my grave and all these people will be standing around it talking about the mistakes I made likw, “Her roots were far too dark for platinum blonde hair! Wahhhh, boohoooo,” “She should never have applied to all Ivy League schools! *sobbing sobbing sobbing*” and “Why didn’t she take her boyfriend to junior prom? Whyyyyyyyyy?” Then I’ll schwoop back to the present and realize how to rectify my terrible life decisions. Why did I ever let that stupid ho convince me not to bring Jacob to prom anyway? And then I’ll crash my high school’s prom. Or something.

Anyway, I’ll tell you how my time traveling between Christmases goes when I get back.